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Writer's pictureMerve Kagitci Hokamp

Beyond Leadership: The Coaching Mindset for Personal Growth


coaching mindset, merve kagitci hokamp

Are you feeling trapped in the monotony of everyday routines? 


Do you find yourself yearning for more meaningful growth in your professional life? 


Are you searching for a way to maximize your potential and achieve your ambitions? 


Do you feel you have some unknowns about yourself and your context and you are intrigued to demystify them and learn?


Are the people around you (and relevant to you, like your team, your family, your friends) feeling stuck and you are not sure how to unlock them?


If you find yourself nodding along to one or more of these questions, the coaching mindset might be the transformative solution you've been looking for. This distinctive approach to interaction emphasizes growth, collaboration, and self-discovery. At its core, the coaching mindset is about creating an atmosphere where questioning, listening, and empowering are central. This environment, then, aids individuals in uncovering new insights, enhancing creativity and innovation, adopting a future-focused and optimistic outlook, and unlocking their full potential.


THE LEADER AS A COACH


The need for a coaching mindset in the workplace has never been more apparent. Recent studies reveal depressing trends: 


Feeling Burnt Out:


  • A 2023 Gallup poll found that 57% of U.S. employees reported feeling burned out at work very often or somewhat often.

Feeling Like There is No Potential:


  • A 2021 Gallup report found that 68% of U.S. workers did not feel their jobs allowed them to use their full potential.

Leaders Feeling Lack of Control:


Feeling Unheard:



These trends are undoubtedly alarming, and they underscore a critical issue in the traditional style of management. The older, more conventional approach to management, where leaders dictate actions and employees follow suit, where decisions are made behind closed doors, and where a silo mentality prevails with little to no input from employees, is clearly faltering. 


With a coaching mindset, leaders are better equipped to make tough decisions and take advantage of opportunities that arise. In fact, according to a Forbes article, 80% of organizations that work on continuous improvement programs using a coaching mindset outperform those that don’t. By shifting from a directive approach to one that is more insightful and curious about motives and methods, leaders can create a more inclusive and empowering work culture.  The coaching mindset encourages the leaders to zone in on the long-term impact of their decisions, not just for immediate teams but for future generations as well, and as such is a sustainable growth strategy serving business benefit as well as employee well-being.


EVERYDAY COACHING MINDSET MOMENTS


The coaching mindset isn't exclusively for those in leadership roles; it's a versatile approach that can be embraced by anyone in their interactions with colleagues, family members, or even in self-reflection. For instance, when your children are upset, instead of rushing to solve the problem, ask them WHAT would make them feel better. This approach encourages them to express their needs and find solutions. When you're feeling stuck on a project, pose the question to yourself: HOW can I break out of this standstill? This self-inquiry can lead to innovative ways to overcome obstacles. And if your colleagues are experiencing a slump, encourage them to recall a past moment WHEN they felt similarly challenged but managed to persevere. Ask them to consider what was different or what helped them succeed that time, using it as a learning experience for the current situation.


3 COACHING MINDSET STRATEGIES FOR SUCCESS


I'd like to share three coaching mindset strategies that have proven to be incredibly effective in my journey as a leader and coach, and also in everyday life scenarios.


1. Be a Player, Not a Victim:


The 'Victim' focuses on powerlessness and blame, which often results in pessimism and a lack of action. Individuals with a victim attitude typically speak in a passive voice and react to situations rather than proactively addressing them. Victims accept, players control and influence (see below three spheres of control - CIA framework) They perceive circumstances as things that happen to them, without recognizing their own agency or control. On the other hand, the 'Player' takes responsibility, is proactive, and keeps an optimistic outlook. Players view challenges not as obstacles but as valuable opportunities for growth and improvement.


Adopting a player attitude gives you:


  • Empowerment and Control: Instilling a sense of personal empowerment and control over your circumstances, allowing proactive steps towards your goals and challenges.

  • Positive Outlook and Motivation: Fostering a positive outlook, enabling you to view challenges as opportunities for growth and development rather than as insurmountable obstacles.

  • Responsibility and Accountability: Encouraging responsibility for your actions and their outcomes, leading to greater accountability and a more constructive approach to problem-solving and decision-making.

CIA framework, Player versus Victim

Try this:


If you find yourself running late to a meeting due to traffic, instead of simply saying, "I was stuck in traffic," acknowledge your part in it. For instance, you could say, "I am late because I didn't anticipate the heavy traffic and leave earlier." This way, you're taking ownership of the situation.


2. Identify as a Learner, Knowing is over-rated:


Knowers limit themselves by resisting new ideas and defending their current knowledge. Learners, on the other hand, thrive on curiosity, openness to new information, and the understanding that learning is an ongoing journey. When a colleague struggles with a task, learners try asking open-ended questions to explore and learn together, knowers volunteer their knowledge as to what they assume the situation is.


Learners are able to:


  • Continuously Acquire New Knowledge: Always open to absorbing new information and skills, facilitating continuous personal and professional growth.

  • Adapt and Innovate: More adaptable to change and able to innovate effectively, finding novel solutions to challenges.

  • Enhance Self-Awareness and Understanding: More self-aware, understanding their strengths and areas for improvement, allowing for more targeted and effective development.


open questions, powerful questions, coaching questions
Try this:

The next time you notice a colleague facing challenges with a work task, instead of giving them advice, engage them with open-ended questions. Start your queries with words like 'Why', 'How', 'When', 'Which', or 'Who'. This approach can foster a more exploratory and collaborative problem-solving process.

3. Stretch Out of Your Comfort Zone:


Comfort, while providing a sense of familiarity and safety, often results in a plateau of personal and professional development. It's in the Stretch Zone, lying just beyond the bounds of comfort, where the magic of real growth occurs. This dynamic zone is marked by a healthy level of stress and the necessity for adaptability, pushing individuals to expand their capabilities and explore new possibilities. It's here that one aligns with the concept of Flow, as described by psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. Flow represents a state of deep engagement, a point where one's skills are aptly challenged, leading to a harmonious balance between capability and difficulty. Achieving Flow in the Stretch Zone is not just about pushing boundaries; it's about entering a state where you find equilibrium, leading to peak performance and profound personal satisfaction. This zone encourages continuous learning, adaptability, and the kind of growth that is essential for both personal fulfillment and professional advancement.


In the Stretch Zone:


  • Challenges are Manageable: Significant enough to stimulate growth but not so overwhelming as to lead to anxiety or burnout.

  • Adaptability is Key: Learning to adjust and find solutions in unfamiliar situations.

  • Moderate Stress is Beneficial: Acting as a catalyst for development, pushing us to stretch our capabilities and learn new skills.

flow state, Mihály Csíkszentmihályi, stretch zone

Try this:

Next time you talk to your manager, inquire about the expectations and responsibilities of the next level in your career path. Express your eagerness to grow and request a project that aligns with those higher-level responsibilities. This will give you an opportunity to stretch into it!

Conclusion


The coaching mindset is more than a tool for leaders; it's a lens through which anyone can view their life and interactions. By adopting strategies like being a Player, a Learner, and stretching beyond comfort, individuals can unlock their full potential. This mindset encourages a shift in perspective, fostering new ways of thinking, perceiving, and acting. Embrace these strategies and witness a transformation in your personal and professional growth. Remember, it's not just about reaching a specific outcome; it's about the journey of continuous learning and adapting.


Intrigued? Join My Coaching Mindset Webinar!


coaching mindset, free webinar

On February 22nd, I'm co-hosting a FREE webinar diving deeper into the coaching mindset and its transformative power. Learn practical strategies and frameworks like the CIA framework and the Johari Window to implement these practices in your life, overcome limiting beliefs, and unlock your full potential.



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